Well, I gave in my notice a few minutes ago. It is a terrible feeling. I really do love my company and the people here. But I told them if I had known there would be almost no real work for me here and that my day would be spent scraping for new accounts, I would have gone back to America and set up my own business. If I have to scrape, at this point in my life I’d like to do it for my own company, not someone else’s.

Right now there is silence, one hour after I sent in the email. It is extremely uncomfortable and I feel kind of sick. I don’t like to disappoint people, and they are going to freak. But it’s a two-way street; they told me I would get something (work to do!), and it never happened. There comes a point where we have to do what is best for ourselves, and spending time alone in an office twiddling my thumbs isn’t my idea of a dream job.

Still, I feel really down. Two people in particular have been so good to me here and I learned so much from them, and I know that right now they are furious with me. What can you do? Do I live to make them happy or to achieve my own goals and dreams? Shit, you can never please everyone….

UPDATE: It’s now nearly 6 hours since I sent the email, and there’s a deafening silence. I think they’re trying to figure out what to do. I’d feel a little worse, but I just went back and reviewed a Dec. 3 email I sent them saying this would happen if they didn’t start giving me some solid work to do. Their response was a one-liner, “Hang in there.” Enough hanging.

The Discussion: 8 Comments

Don’t let it get you down. Your decision was made, Richard. Don’t let it rip you apart by second-guessing or assuming responsibility for the feelings of others.

January 19, 2004 @ 1:21 pm | Comment

I imagine the next few days will be hard, but if you’re confident it’s the right decision for you then it should all work out. Good luck for landing on your feet and if you’re passing through Zhangjiagang (why?!) there’s always a spare room.

January 19, 2004 @ 1:39 pm | Comment

Thanks guys, I really appreciate it. What a grim day.

January 19, 2004 @ 1:40 pm | Comment

hi, Richard, you could be a very wonderful friend to many chinese people, we do like you speak something to make this country more freedom and democratic, i guess if i am right to this point, if you could say it in a way that many chinese can accept, you could be a very very good friend, i mean it, i guess everyone face the same problem as you, just make a decision for your own benefits, cheer up and good luck.

January 19, 2004 @ 1:49 pm | Comment

Thanks George — why can’t we always communicate with each other in such a friendly way? I appreciate it.

January 19, 2004 @ 1:56 pm | Comment

definitely, though we are different in languages and attitude, but we are the same in human nature, be proactive at what you want and go for it straightly, you can be very successful in pursuing your aim with your wisdom

January 19, 2004 @ 2:14 pm | Comment

Well done. I’m on the verge of deciding to return to the U.S. too, but for rather different reasons…

January 19, 2004 @ 3:57 pm | Comment

All the best, Richard. To put a dumbshit attempt at keeping you quiet to good, sincere use: ‘Hang in there.’

January 19, 2004 @ 8:28 pm | Comment

RSS feed for comments on this post. TrackBack URL

Sorry, the comment form is closed at this time.